Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Money Can Buy Love

Recently I've made a serious effort to not talk much about my bartending or my bars or the people in my bars. My current gig is awesome and I'm just not in a place where I can get shitcanned for blogging (again). But something happened last night that deserves mention. I'm keeping it ultra-vague though.

A girl I sort of know comes into the bar, orders two beers, asks me to run her card. The tab comes to 6.50 $. She looks at me, smiles and proceeds to leave a 50 dollar tip. I wasn't that surprised because this girl had done the same thing a few months ago. I smiled and slapped her high five. I then proceeded to ring the fuck out of the "tip bell." What happened next was the remarkable part.

She comes back up 5 minutes later and asks for two shots. I make the shots and I hand them to her. I tell her that the shots are on the house. She shakes her head NO and hands me her card.

"Run it."

I run the card for 12 dollars and she proceeds to again leave me a 50 dollar tip.

She comes up 5 minutes later, refuses a free round and leaves another 50 dollar tip on a 6.50 tab.

For those of you keeping track at home, that's 150 dollars in tips on 25 dollars. I showed my manager immediately to assure him that I didn't give out any free drinks to earn such a huge tip.

The girl?? Well, she just bought my love for life. She can have it all, and by all, I mean she can get the "little Jack Goes Forth" and an all-expenses paid date to Weezies Kitchen. Although knowing her, I probably won't have to pay.


Rudy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Rudy said...

What did she look like, grossly physically disfigured?

Jack Goes Forth said...

actually Rudy, she's a little cutie. Older than me, but not bad.

Besides, enough money can make any disfigurement invisible. No legs? "That'll be 50 K darlin."

Anonymous said...

Ahhhh, the dream of every slacker. To become a kept man and spend his days poolside in a skimpy black speedo.

Tom Sanchez Prunier said...

I hope this is indeed the beginning of something lovely, and not a woman running up the credit card balance of a boyfriend or husband in spite.

Sorry, first thing I thought of.

Jason said...

Tom ... I'm thinking the same thing. Actually Jack, I thought of a woman named D. I hope you spill the beans. And stop being vague! It's not your style.

Jocelyn Testes-Harder said...

"Shitcanned" is such a terrific word. I wish the newspaper and local news channels would use it when they report all the massive local layoffs.

Viv said...

Now that I'm a wife and mother at the decrepit age of 37, this blog makes me, in equal measures, a) achingly miss the Richmond bar scene and b) thank ye gods that I don't have to deal with horndogs like Jack anymore. Such contradictions! Love your blog, Jack!

Anonymous said... can money really buy love?

the one and only ridor said...

my god ... i'm speechless. can i work w/ ya, jack?