Friday, November 28, 2008

I'm Big With The Cougar Crowd

I got this email last night and it left me scratching my head:


HI - I'm just an average 30-something housewife who reads
and enjoys your blog. I had to tell you that I actually had a dream about you
last night. Oddly enough, considering most of the posts on your blog, the dream
was never about sex - though I must have been younger because we were dating!: )Anyhow, just to let you know your "sphere of influence" - Love your
blog!


-(Name Redacted)


Apparently I'm huge with the 30-something housewife crowd. Who would've thought?

So for all those 30-somethings out there who read this blog (including the sender of the above email) and who happen to look like this 30 something housewife:



Please do not hesitate to contact me at Jackgoesforth@gmail.com or you can just saunter up to the bar in some sort of animal print (leopard works) for identification purposes and then proceed to drop the room key to whatever local hotel room you purchased in advance for our rendezvous. Although ladies, please keep in mind that I only lay my head down in three stars or above.

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm wondering, at what age exactly does a woman become a cougar? Is there a cut-off? My husband always jokes that he saved me from being a cougar. (We got married when I was 31.) I thought cougars were only single older women?

Anyone? Bueller?

Jack Goes Forth said...

I'm not sure that there is a set definiton for what a cougar is. I can say for a fact though, being married does not make you immune to cougardom.

I see many married cougars at the bars.

This might be worthy of it's own blogpost. I'll get to work.

By the by, I don't ever respond to anonymous comments, but the Ferris drop-in won me over.

Richmondite said...

The ol' hotel room key drop off. If I had a nickel....

Meade Skelton said...

She is quite a sight. But I hardly consider it an accomlishment. 30 is the new 21, and frankly, Ive seen women in their 40s that look even better. Like the lovely Miss Nicole Kidman!

Anonymous said...

I had to google "cougar" b/c I thought they were 40+. Not so. I also found this definition:

An older woman who frequents clubs in order to score with a much younger man. The cougar can be anyone from an overly surgically altered wind tunnel victim, to an absolute sad and bloated old horn-meister, to a real hottie or milf. Cougars are gaining in popularity -- particularly the true hotties -- as young men find not only a sexual high, but many times a chick with her shit together.

Robot Boy said...

Jack, you're breaking new ground here in the blogosphere. Much love.

The One and Only Ridor said...

Gawd!

Only if you're gay ...

R-

Julie in Midlothian said...

Jack, please devote an blogpost to what defines a cougar. I'm 37 and I would die if a younger guy referred to me as a cougar. I don't go to bars much anymore, but if I did - let's say it's a mom's night out - am I automatically a cougar? The very thought mortifies me. Or does it depend on what I wear? Or am I automatically a cougar because of my age?

I'm losing sleep over this!

Anonymous said...

An older woman who is at a bar isn't automatically a cougar. There has to be an affirmative step like being on the "prowl."

Robot Boy said...

The implication here seems to be that being a 'cougar' is a bad thing. Not at all, I say.

Jack Goes Forth said...

Julie, I'm working a cougar blogpost, which may or may not become the definitive answer to what constitutes cougardom. Stay tuned.

Anasi- I would never imply that a cougar is bad. They have more money and they're freaks in the sheets. Two things that are very very good.

Susan Howson said...

If cougars are over 30 then are silver foxes also? Oh Josh Hartnett! Silver fox!

Meade Skelton said...

Nicole Kidman is the most beautiful woman in the world. So maybe you're the one who is gay.