Sunday, August 3, 2008

Caffeinated Bartending For Beginners


Friday night, I made bank.


Saturday night, money money money.


And Sunday???? Sunday was supposed to be the big dog, the piece de resistance. There was a huge concert down on 18th Street and my bar is located 50 yards from where the stage was set up. We were going to get slammed with emo rock kids, all clamoring for an ice cold beer. Fights were to going to erupt over Pete Wentz and I'd be in the middle of it collecting 20 dollar bills. I was gonna walk out with at least 500 dollars on the day and that almost seemed like a conservative estimate. In my mind I had already paid my cell phone bill, got a new tattoo and put a down payment on a flat screen with what I was going to make on Sunday. Unfortunately....

Things didn't quite pan out like I planned. The concert, whose headliners were the bands Good Charlotte and Boys Like Girls, turned out to be very poorly attended. Most of the people who did attend happened to be 12, so that didn't help either. In fact it was probably a good thing I was stuck in the bar because there were way to many hot 16 year olds prancing around who could've easily passed for 24 (I need to start hiring a security guy to follow me around and check IDs).

Anyways, around 10 AM this morning I forced myself out of bed (I didn't get out of work til 2:30 AM the night before) and got ready to get my ass handed to me all day today, or so I thought. I showered, got dressed and hit Starbucks for the juice. Then I get there and see that Monster Energy Drinks have sponsored us for the day. I decide to have a few Monsters to really get into my groove. So by 2 PM I'm caffeinated out of my fucking mind with no one to sling drinks to. I'm manic, I can't sit still. I pace around the bar, growling, yelling at no one in particular, "who wants a fucking drink?!!!?" Luckily two of the other bartenders decided to get jacked up too, so no one really noticed my extreme excitement for work.

The crazy rush of drinkers we expected never came, and we closed up shop around 9 PM. I'm disappointed, but not surprised. You learn to expect the unexpected when it comes to bar tending and restaurants.

Now it's 3 AM (Monday) and I'm like a roller coaster of emotions from the crazy influx of caffeine and the mix of Bud Light I threw in after we got off early tonight. It's like I hear a good song and I'm high as a helicopter, but then the next minute my head's on the desk as I try and write this. I knew there was a reason I'm trying to kick caffeine altogether. I'd probably be better off just snorting Adderall from now on...

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Dude, Pete Wentz is so in Fall Out Boy. Get your top 40 bands right. It's all about the Joel Madden. Jeez.

Jack Goes Forth said...

haha. I know he's in Fall Out Boy, I just mentioned him because he seems to be the emo crowds poster boy.

J.Woods said...

Why does adderall taste like candy? Makes no fucking sense to me why they would flavor that shit. Smurf boogers anyone?

Caffeine is good, adderall is diet coke. Stimulants are amazing while they last. Too bad I hate seeing the sun rise, it tells me how shitty im going to feel that day.

Anonymous said...

Adderall should be prescribed for obesity. That stuff is basically legalized cocaine.